Which F-word Will You Choose?!!

"The family.  We were a strange little band of characters trudging through life sharing diseases and toothpaste, coveting one another's desserts, hiding shampoo, borrowing money, locking each other out of our rooms, inflicting pain and kissing to heal it in the same instant, loving, laughing, defending, and trying to figure out the common thread that bound us all together."  ~Erma Bombeck

It is wisely said that blood is thicker than water, thus meaning that family is most important and should come first before friends or acquaintances. But is this really what we practice upon in our everyday lives?

There are many arguments as to who plays the greatest role and influence in a person's life. Some might say the parents as they have, or should have, majority of control, and as they are the ones who shape a person from birth to become the person which they grow up to be. However, some may disagree with this statement, stating that friends play the greatest influence and role in a person's life because as one grows up, life becomes about fitting in with a group of people and fitting into the norm of society, thus following your friends. The amount of time one spends with their friends also emphasises this point greatly.

Regardless of who plays the greatest role in your life, at the end of the day, the question that I want to ask, and the question which you should be asking yourself is: Which F-word will you choose?... Friends or Family??

The answer to the question: 70% of the time, in our teenage years, we choose friends over family!

Reaching the teenage years, we become those people who suddenly care about how we look, we worry about what people think and say. We are no more those carefree souls in primary school who would run around with mud on our cheeks and paint splashed on our clothes not worrying about what other people thought. Instead, we are all about appearance, reputation, status and class. We all want to be seen and heard, and we all want to fit in... Even if fitting in means turning our back on our own family.

Sometimes its not about fitting in or being cool, maybe its just about who we feel comfortable with. Majority of people truly expose they inner self when they are with friends. That's when they can be themselves and have fun.

But, whilst we are growing up, making friends and having fun.. Do we ever stop and think about our family?

How many times have we chose "Movie night with the girls" over "Scrabble night with the family"?? 

Or how many times have we chose "Soccer with the guys" over "Fishing with dad" ??

Think about it.. 70% of the time we rather chose friends over family! Why??.. Well, because they are funnier, cooler, better to hang out with, we can be naughty with them, we can talk nonsensical stories and they somehow understand this teen-language that we speak, better than our family.

Whilst with our family we somewhat feel restricted.. At least that's what most people think.. I mean.. You can't exactly talk to your parents about that guy/girl everyone's crushing on.

Yes, we all need friends for all those good times.. But what about family? 

Ask yourself this:

How many friends have you had in your life? How many of them said they would be by your side forever and left? How long have you been friends with your current friends? How much of your life do your friends really know?

And now ask yourself this:

How long have your family been in your life? How many times has your family promised to be by your side and were actually there? How many times have they sacrificed for you? How much of your life do your family really know?

But.. HOW MANY TIMES DO WE CHOOSE FRIENDS OVER FAMILY????

Its become so sad that I've seen elder sisters display cruelty to their younger sister when in front of friends. I've seen daughters who are, for some reason, too embarrassed to walk with their parents and shy away from them. I've seen son's back chat to their mothers when in front of their friends.

Why do we have this crazy idea that our friends will always be there for us? 

We do so much for friendship, dedicate so much of our lives in the name of friendship.. What guarantee do we have that tomorrow that friend will still be that.. Our friend? Especially in High School.. How do we know if, when we complete matric, we will still meet up with that friend whom we substituted our family time to go out with then?

We might not realise it, but we are all somehow guilty of this. Some of us more than others. We take for granted our family and we don't appreciate them for the blessing that they are. Instead we see them as the people we have to and are forced to live with. Family is important because you didn't ask for them, you can't change them, and yet of all the people on earth they're likely to know you best and be the most important to you.

Anthony Brandt put it rightly when he said:

"Other things may change us, but we start and end with family."

It is only when we are left all alone to deeply ponder over our most prized possessions do we realise the true value of family.

So let's do that.. Let's consider all that our family is, all that they mean to us, and all that they've done for us.. And for once.. LET'S CHOOSE FAMILY OVER FRIENDS!!